Selfies – A Farce

So the different selves were having a discussion:

Selfie One :(Piously) I want to give it  all up – Dresses, wealth, property, grains, even my hair. And when the last bit is given away, of my shorn tresses too, I will wear white and retire.Far from the madding crowd.

Selfie Two: (Laughing uproariously) You  are no Bathsheba Everdeen dearie! In fact, you remind me of Father Sergius! That awfully confused Kasatsky himself! I would not mind dancing a jig, sipping something strong, having  some admiring souls in the neighbourhood! Pass that water, will you?

Selfie Three: (Interjecting politely) You two! Always fighting like those addled country cousins! I mean, country couples, literally. What I mean is actually, explicitly,literally those countries at war from eons. This nonsense should stop. You are like those blind men exploring the elephant. Both are right, both are wrong.

It is time you read some spiritual poetry.  Was it Tukaram? An army of ants armed with sticks went up to an elephant and threatened it. The pachyderm, said, ” Dear scholars, good that I am of serene temperament.” I feel so too- when you two bicker; when Dharmas bicker.

Self Two: ( Sticks out a tongue) Brother, brother! Thou art so eloquent! Pray, when my Dharma is in opposite league with yours, what else can you do but shove the truth down the throat? Like William of Baskerville and the blind Jorge themselves?

Selfie One (Miffed for being ticked off, loses it a bit.)   You think you are the only smart one out here? I won debates in my college days too, Selfie dear!Umberto Eco had  Jorge saying, ” Laughing at evil means not preparing oneself to combat it, and laughing at good means denying the power through which good is self propagating… The tenth degree of humility is not to be quick in laughter. Stultus in risu exaltat vocem suam.” So there!

Self Two ( Googling furiously )Wait, wait. In the next page…..yesssss, here it is! ” Tum podex carmen extulit horridulum!” hahahahahahaha

Selves One, Three shudder not very delicately. They are used to getting these jolts from Self Two. But sometimes, Selfie Two can get too much. Like reality star posteriors. Preposterously preponderant.

Selfie One: I am leaving. There is a literature festival down the block.

Selfie Two: Yepppp. I hear some of the authors are very hot!

Selfie One: Disgusting mind, you have! What the hell do I care of their biceps or straightened hair?   Have you not heard of Wabi Sabi?  Nothing is permanent, nothing  is complete, nothing is perfect.

Selfie Two: Hehehe. All  that men and women care in this Maya filled world of ours is to be seen, watched, admired, adored, loved, attended to. It is based on the philosophy of hoarding, selfishness, me, me,me and me . Doubts? I really need a strong drink, after wasting time with you losers!

Selfie Three (Loses all Diplomatic elan and altruistic motives): Selfie One, Peggotty is willing even if Barkis is not! Shall we do it?

Selfie One (With devilish glee!) Yeah!!!!!

Selfie One and Selfie Three lurch towards Selfie Two. In between two chokes and one gasp, they overpower a half drunk Selfie, and throw her into a dustbin. Then they click a Selfie and Post in online in selface.com. It becomes viral. Selfie Two gets an offer to star in a Hollywood movie. The self effacing ones are tried by the Divine Court.

Moral of the Story?

Be a light unto yourself.  Be Unapologetic. (Forget about evangelizing the rest.)

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